The Black Hole

Brubaker. That was the name of my first real bicycle. My dad bought it for me on my 11th birthday. Brubaker was orange with real rubber tires. Not like the hard plastic tires I had on my previous one. Couldn't put air in them at all. If they got flat might as well get a new bike. Which was the very reason why my dad bought me Brubaker. Getting that bike was like a coming of age. Slishy was becoming a big boy.

Now having Brubaker was great , but there was only one draw back. Slish Sr wouldn't let me leave the block with it. He was afraid an older kid would take it from me. So riding up and doooown my block became redundant. I got bored quick. Before you knew it Brubaker was collecting dust in my basment.

It wasn't until a few years later when Fondu and his big brother got bmx bikes. I brought Brubaker out of retirement. The crew had started a little bike posse. We used to build ramps and jump over shit. Well actually we used to jump over people. If you could jump over 4 individuals lying on the floor! You were the man! Brubaker wasn't built like those bmx bikes. All light in the frame and shit. So Fondu and his brother held that title until our parents caught us and SHUT THAT SHIT DOOOOOOWN.

One Saturday morning in the summer. Phantom comes over to get me for our usual visit to the ice cream store. Our video game of choice Arabian Knights. I get dressed, run down the stairs and push open the screen door. Phantom is sitting on my porch waiting patiently. " What took you so long? " I respond " Had to make sure my fro was tight" Phantom laughing" The only way that girl(Casey) is gonna notice you is if you talk to her and we know you're too chicken shit to do that" I respond " Yo Momma! " Phantom stops, looks at my head, and says " Your fro is uneven " I gasp like a little bitch and run back into the house. When I get there I look in the mirror. Muthafucka !!! He got me again!!!

5 minutes later Phantom and I head over to Fondu's house to pick him up. That seemed to be our routine. Phantom comes and gets me we both go and pick up Fondu. Today would be different. When we get to Fondu's house. He and our other boy Lump Lump are prepping their bikes. I say " Hey. You not coming to the ice cream shop?" Fondu quickly responds " Nope" Phantom " Where you guys going? " Fondu grins proudly " To that man made dirt bike course next to the Bowling Alley " Lump Lump knodding his head in approval. Phantom " I wouldn't do that if I were you " Fondu gives Phantom a screw faced look " Why! " Phantom " Rumor has it. That place is like the black hole." Fondu looking all confused pointing a scewdriver at Phantom " What is that supposed to mean" Phantom " It means you'll come back, but your bike won't. " Fondu's eyebrows tighten " Shut the fuck up. You just jealous cause you don't know how to ride a bike" Which was true Phantom had never learned to ride. He used to just sit around and watch us. Fondu " Slish you wanna come " I respond " Nope. You heard Phantom" Fondu laughs " Ain't nobody gonna steal that piece of shit you riding" I respond " Laugh if you want to. I remember hearing your mom say if something happens to that brand new bike she got you. She was not only going to beat your ass with every pot in the house but you would not be getting another one. " Fondu gets on his bike and rides over to phantom and I. He starts sniffing and says " Both of you smell like pussy " Fondu and Lump Lump ride off.

Phantom and I go the Ice cream store as planned. We play a few video games and eat some ice cream. On our way home we decide to take the long way so that we would end up on Fondu's side of the block. As we're walking up the hill we see Lump Lump kicking rocks and Fondu sitting on his steps with his head between his hands. We head on over to them. I say " Whats the matter? What happened?" I start looking around and didn't notice Fondu's or Lump Lump's bike " Where are your bikes?" Lump Lump shakes his head and sighs " They took them " Phantom " Stop playing! For real! Fondu finally lifts his head up. WHOA!!!!! His face was FUCKED UP! Lip swollen and split wiiide open. I look at Lump Lump. Not a scratch on him. Fondu " You happy now Phantom! You gonna say I told you so!" Phantom chuckles " Nah, but your lip is fucked up. You might have to go to the emergency room." I say " Lump Lump how come you don't have a scratch on you?" Fondu says" Lump Lump is a PUSSY. They just tapped him on the shoulder and he gave his shit up! ME! I FOUGHT FOR MY BIKE" Lump Lump rubs his face and responds " My bike wasn't worth ruining my good looks" Phantom and I laughed so hard our stomachs started to hurt.

Fondu is infuriated now. " You guys think this shit is funny!" Lump Lump " No one told you to hold on to the handle bars while the dude who was stealing your bike was punching you in the face" Phantom laughing even harder " Thats what happen ! Thats how you got that fat lip!" Phantom then pushes out his bottom lip. Making fun of Fondu. Fondu responds " Fuck You! Phantom shouts back " No! Fuck You!" and pushes out his bottom lip again " You're the one with the FAT LIP and NO BIKE! Think i'm going to wait till your momma gets home so I can witness the biggest beat down of the century! " Right then. Fondu realised the worst part of his situation was not over.

Later on that day his momma beat him like he had two parents and swore he would never get another bike from her. Lucky for him. The brother Fondu now despises offered him his bike . In doing so he gave up a portion of his childhood so that his little brother could have one. Funny thing is. If you tell fondu that story he still has the same response

" Fuck You"