Today I seemed to be obsessed with Breasts. Everywhere I turned I saw some perky titties. We had a fire drill at the office and all I could think about as i'm walking down the steps is allllll the titties I'm about to see. I'm sick, I know it , & i'm not ashamed.
After the fire drill was over I went back into my office and noticed my cell phone had 3 missed calls Soulmate, Lady Di, & Dough boy. I call Soulmate first she picks up I say " "What a gwan sexy " Thats Jamaican for "Watcha doin hot mama" Soulmate giggles & says " Nothing what are you up to. " I Say " Ooooh nothing really just trying to figure out a way to steal you away from Dr Dolittle" She laughs even harder. I think to myself "That shit wasn't that funny". She replies in this sweet warm voice " What am I gonna do with you." I reply "Thats what my mama keeps telling me " anyway we spend about a 1/2 hour trying to figure out who broke up with whom. I tell her she broke up with me she says no thats not true. Oh so if thats not true technically we're still together and your CHEATING ON ME WITH THAT MEDIC!!!!!! I tell her Dolittle's days are numbered & we say our goodbyes.
I call Lady Di. She picks up " Hello Mr Slish" I say "thats Big Daddy to you" . Lady Di responds " How many times do I have to tell you I am not calling you Big Daddy. I say " They all resist at first" She laughs and tells me how terrible her trip to mexico was & that the tallest person she saw was 5'6. I think to myself "That means all the players on the mexican olympic basketball team are either ringers or on steroids". We make plans for this weekend and say our good byes.
I leave work and head to Stamford Connecticut. I have a meeting with my new boss YES MAN!!!! I have picked up a fourth part time job. Why do I do this? 1. I never finished college(my mother just forgave me) 2. My full time job pays just a little more than Mcdonalds & 3. My jet set lifestyle requires fuel. The deal is made. She agrees to pay me a small fortune I agree to spend every penny. I leave and head to White Plains for some important business.
I'm in front of the thirsty turtle now. My cell phone rings. Its Fondu one of my childhood buddies . I pick up and say "I can't believe it" He disregards my comment and says " Slish whats up with Phantoms bachelor party." I say " Funny you should ask me that i'm in front of the bar right now about to go inside and book their private lounge" He says" Cool make sure when you book the scrippers at least two of them have to eat each other out" I pull the phone away from my ear " This nigga watches more porn than I do" I respond " Aight I'll see what I can do" I hang up go inside and book the lounge.
I'm on my way to my parents house now. My cell phone rings again its MT3. Please whatever higher power is out there PLEASE TAKE THIS TEMPTATION AWAY FROM ME!!!!! I pick up. "Hey Slish where you at" I respond " White Plains " She says " White Plains road ?" I say " No didn't you get the memo? I'm bougie White Plains New York. She laughs " So what can I do for you" She says " Nothing just calling to see whats poppin tonight. " I tell her a few places. She asks if I want to cum I tell her stop teasing OH ! you mean come with you. I decline. But the beast in me me says " Maybe we can play tomorrow . " She declines her hubby is coming back from the bahamas tomorrow. I say let me call you back
I get to my parents. I see my sister's car veeerrry unusual. Some thoughts go through my head but good common sense and a fear of the unknown urge me to mind my own business. I say hello to Pops and go into my Mama's room shes watching a dvd " Hi ma " This woman can't turn her head away from the television and says " Shhhh I don't want to miss anything. YOU CRAZY JAMAICAN COCONUT PRESS THE PAUSE BUTTON!!!. She gives me that boooooy if you touch that remote control its on look. Good common sense and the fear of the unknown urges me to keep quiet and let the movie finish.
Dvd is over now. I have her attention. I ask what my sister is doing here. "Oh she's just visiting" My mother is a terrible liar. I change the subject. We chit chat a bit then she takes a look at me and says " You look You look " I say "Sexy? she says "Yeeeah. Now why is it you don't have a girlfriend" Here we go thats my cue to leave. I go upstairs little sis's door is closed I get ready to knock, chicken out and decide to go and play with my nephew. I walk over to the den. My nephew doesn't hear me coming then I notice he's talking to the t.v. and to himself . Ya know what. I'll take my chances with little sis. I knock on the door " Come in" I open the door " Hey watcha doin " she's resting in bed and says " Nothing just watching t.v." My Slish sense starts to tingle but my commen sense says " MIND YO BUSINESS SLISH!!! She'll talk when she's ready and you'll listen with both ears "
Love ya sis.
After the fire drill was over I went back into my office and noticed my cell phone had 3 missed calls Soulmate, Lady Di, & Dough boy. I call Soulmate first she picks up I say " "What a gwan sexy " Thats Jamaican for "Watcha doin hot mama" Soulmate giggles & says " Nothing what are you up to. " I Say " Ooooh nothing really just trying to figure out a way to steal you away from Dr Dolittle" She laughs even harder. I think to myself "That shit wasn't that funny". She replies in this sweet warm voice " What am I gonna do with you." I reply "Thats what my mama keeps telling me " anyway we spend about a 1/2 hour trying to figure out who broke up with whom. I tell her she broke up with me she says no thats not true. Oh so if thats not true technically we're still together and your CHEATING ON ME WITH THAT MEDIC!!!!!! I tell her Dolittle's days are numbered & we say our goodbyes.
I call Lady Di. She picks up " Hello Mr Slish" I say "thats Big Daddy to you" . Lady Di responds " How many times do I have to tell you I am not calling you Big Daddy. I say " They all resist at first" She laughs and tells me how terrible her trip to mexico was & that the tallest person she saw was 5'6. I think to myself "That means all the players on the mexican olympic basketball team are either ringers or on steroids". We make plans for this weekend and say our good byes.
I leave work and head to Stamford Connecticut. I have a meeting with my new boss YES MAN!!!! I have picked up a fourth part time job. Why do I do this? 1. I never finished college(my mother just forgave me) 2. My full time job pays just a little more than Mcdonalds & 3. My jet set lifestyle requires fuel. The deal is made. She agrees to pay me a small fortune I agree to spend every penny. I leave and head to White Plains for some important business.
I'm in front of the thirsty turtle now. My cell phone rings. Its Fondu one of my childhood buddies . I pick up and say "I can't believe it" He disregards my comment and says " Slish whats up with Phantoms bachelor party." I say " Funny you should ask me that i'm in front of the bar right now about to go inside and book their private lounge" He says" Cool make sure when you book the scrippers at least two of them have to eat each other out" I pull the phone away from my ear " This nigga watches more porn than I do" I respond " Aight I'll see what I can do" I hang up go inside and book the lounge.
I'm on my way to my parents house now. My cell phone rings again its MT3. Please whatever higher power is out there PLEASE TAKE THIS TEMPTATION AWAY FROM ME!!!!! I pick up. "Hey Slish where you at" I respond " White Plains " She says " White Plains road ?" I say " No didn't you get the memo? I'm bougie White Plains New York. She laughs " So what can I do for you" She says " Nothing just calling to see whats poppin tonight. " I tell her a few places. She asks if I want to cum I tell her stop teasing OH ! you mean come with you. I decline. But the beast in me me says " Maybe we can play tomorrow . " She declines her hubby is coming back from the bahamas tomorrow. I say let me call you back
I get to my parents. I see my sister's car veeerrry unusual. Some thoughts go through my head but good common sense and a fear of the unknown urge me to mind my own business. I say hello to Pops and go into my Mama's room shes watching a dvd " Hi ma " This woman can't turn her head away from the television and says " Shhhh I don't want to miss anything. YOU CRAZY JAMAICAN COCONUT PRESS THE PAUSE BUTTON!!!. She gives me that boooooy if you touch that remote control its on look. Good common sense and the fear of the unknown urges me to keep quiet and let the movie finish.
Dvd is over now. I have her attention. I ask what my sister is doing here. "Oh she's just visiting" My mother is a terrible liar. I change the subject. We chit chat a bit then she takes a look at me and says " You look You look " I say "Sexy? she says "Yeeeah. Now why is it you don't have a girlfriend" Here we go thats my cue to leave. I go upstairs little sis's door is closed I get ready to knock, chicken out and decide to go and play with my nephew. I walk over to the den. My nephew doesn't hear me coming then I notice he's talking to the t.v. and to himself . Ya know what. I'll take my chances with little sis. I knock on the door " Come in" I open the door " Hey watcha doin " she's resting in bed and says " Nothing just watching t.v." My Slish sense starts to tingle but my commen sense says " MIND YO BUSINESS SLISH!!! She'll talk when she's ready and you'll listen with both ears "
Love ya sis.
posted by Mr.Slish at
7/22/2005 02:00:00 AM
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