I took the day off today per my aunties request. Some painting had to be done and she trusts no one with her house. Since my job is the least important not to mention I live here rent free. I was given the job of MAKE SURE THE PAINTER DON'T BREAK, TAKE, OR RUIN SHIT!!!! To tell the truth I really don't have to be here. My boy, who is doing the job is a professional and the most reliable brotha I know. He has too much pride and not enough steady income to go and f#$%^k this up.


My cousin Bowie has been calling me all day. He's on his way to Hampton's home coming. Topic of conversation. His wife is reluctant to let him drive their new lexus to VA something about the car being a lease. Driving that far will definitely increase the car's mileage thus causing them to pay a hefty fee upon its return to the dealer. 4 YEARS FROM NOW!!!!! I say " Bowie what type of F%&*kry business is that. He says" Thats her argument and she's sticking to it" The Slasher responds " Puhlease she's HATIN!!! MAN UP !!! she expect you to drive a MINIVAN to Hamptons home coming. SHE BLOCKING!!!! if she was going on that trip with her girls you couldn't tell her SHIT!!!!. Hang up this phone and go deal with that. I don't have time for your sissy ass. Call me back when your balls grow back" Bowie starts laughing and says " Aiight later."

An hour goes by. I haven't heard anything from Bowie and decide to call him back. He picks up " What a gwon" I say" You handle your business" Bowie responds " Every ting Crisp" I say" Oooooh so you took the lex " He says " Yeah Mon on my way to VA right now". I start to giggle to myself . He's gonna pay for his insolence. His wife probably got some shit cooking. Wait till he comes back home. I say " Who in the car with you " Bowie responds " Caramel Shady. So are you going to stay home this entire weekend and play with your self." I start laughing and respond " You know the reason your so happy right now , and its not because you got the lex for the weekend. Bowie takes the bait and asks " Why? I respond. " Cause Caramel Shady has been playing with your balls since you left Maryland. Enjoy your trip Batty Bwoy." I hang up.


I'm horrible ,I know it, and i'm not ashamed.