One Night Extravaganza

6pm Saturday evening. I'm looking in the bathroom mirror and rubbing my face. It feels so smooth. That new electric shaver is the shit!!! Closer shave without the irritation. Worth every penny.

6:30 pm i'm done admiring my clean shaven look. I Put on some casual Slish attire. My venue for the evening ? The new bowling alley in Harlem. Can you believe it people!!! Harlem has a bowling alley!!! Anyway Corporate is friends with the owner and was invited to the grand opening. He instructed me to get there early( 7 pm) and secure a prime location so we could meet some beautiful nubian sistas. He ain't the boss of me !!!! So ofcourse I leave at 6: 45 pm.

7 30 pm i'm in Harlem. I park the Substitute Batmobile in front of Harlem Nites building since she lived down the block from the alley. 2 minutes later I attempt to walk into the place and i'm greeted by 2 BOUNCERS . BOUNCERS!!!!! why does a bowling alley need bouncers!!! " Excuse me sir you're here for?" Oh HELL NAW!!!! don't tell me you have to be on a guest list to bowl!!!! I respond " I'm going to the bowling alley" Bouncer responds" Sir the bowling alley does not open up officially until Monday" I respond " Weeeelll why are all these people going in and out of the building" Bouncer " Private Party sir " Just like Corporate not to give me all the details. I take my cell phone out and dial his number he picks up " Whats up " I say " NIGGA THEY WON'T LET ME IN!!!!! Corporate responds " You just getting there? I respond" Yeah " Corporate says " Didn't I tell you to get there early!!! I respond " You ain't the boss of me!!! I got here when I could get here !!!! " Corporate " I'm right around the corner i'll be right there "

10 minutes later Corporate pulls up in the Rover blasting Mama Said Knock You Ooout, parks, and walks over . I give him a pound He says " Sit in the Rover while I go take care of this" YOU AIN'T THE BOSS OF ME!!!! I respond " Aiight" Corporate comes running back to the truck 5 minutes later and says " Aiight we good" We find a better parking spot and go in.

We're inside now. Hmmmmm. This is an upscale spot. Not a crack head in sight!!! Most of the patrons looked liked they were hand picked to be there. Corporate and I head straight for the bar. He meets and greets a few pretty ladies while I try and get the bartenders attention. I give Corporate a She's moving a bit too slow for me. I need a drink dammit!!! look. So we head over to the other side of the alley. Not only is there a lounge area but another Bar!!!! As i'm walking into that area I see my homegirl Churchmouse I point and give her a nod cause I didn't have time to stop and give her a proper hello. The Hennessy was calling a brotha. I get to the bar I ask Corporate " What you drinking." He steady looking uuuup and dooowwn the bar Aww hell!!! I say " Nigga they ain't got none of that fancy gasoline you like to drink PICK SOMETHING!!! " Corporate says" Coors Light " I say to the bartender "Coors Light and Hennessy straight up no ice"

Drink in hand I leave Corporate at the bar and walk over to Churchmouse and give her a hug. Churchmouse says " Whats with the new look " I respond" What you talking about" Churchmouse " When did you start shaving off your mustache" I respond " Shaved it off by accident one day and realized I looked younger without it so I never grew it back. Trying to bag me a young chick. You women over thirty got to many damn issues." We both start laughing Churchmouse pats me on my stomach and says " ooooooh you even lost some weight I think I feel a six pack" I respond " Think i'm playin. So how the fellas treating you" Churchmouse " Please same ol b.s. think i'm going to have to cut my latest love interest off. He's little bit too shady" I say " Shady how? Churchmouse" Lets just say he's into private pharmaceuticals" The Slasher says " You know its about time I took you on a date. Your going out with too many losers. Churchmouse responds " Oh really " Slasher responds" Thats right. Its time you learned how a man should really be courting you" Churchmouse says " Where you gonna take me ? Slasher responds " Don't you worry bout that " Corporate comes over and says " Yo ain't nothing in here for me lets head down to 40 40 " I hate that place but after 2 glasses of hennessy Slish will say yes to anything. Since Churchmouse didn't have a ride home I give her my car keys and tell her to park it in her neighborhood. Corporate and I head into Manhattan.

10 pm we're inside 40 40. We meet and greet a few more pretty ladies . Corporate finds qouting Jamie Fox "This Pretty Little Thang" I play Robin to his Batman and keep her friend busy while he gets his mack on. His Mission accomplished. Mine!?? Lets just say she took my number. Yall know what that means. We walk around the club looking for more targets. None spotted. I look at the time on my cell and say to Corporate " Time for us to go. I told my cousin Bowie I would meet him and his wife BB at the Harlem Grill" Corporate responds " Kewl" We leave

11:30 pm We pull up in front of The Harlem Grill , I call Churchmouse and ask her to meet me in front of the Restuarant at 12:15 am. We walk inside. I see a few familiar faces and head to the back of the restuarant. I notice Bowie, BB and their friends sitting in the corner. I walk over. BB jumps out of her seat and runs over and gives me a hug " Cousin Sliiiiiishy I miiissed you" She lets go , I look around the rest of the table OH SHIT!!!! Mrs Jones!!!! ( refer to my post Feb 6th post Me and Mrs Jones) and her husband is not present. Damn!!!! she still looks good can't believe she pushed 3 kids out that body. We make eye contact . She slides out of the booth walks over and gives me the tightest hug. Then she whispers in my ear " I'm getting a divorce "

Bloggers looks like my b day gift is coming early cause The Slasher heard that shit Loud and Clear.